Rekindling enthusiasm for your love making
I repeat… Intentions, intentions, intentions!
I have, in two distinct times in my life, intentionally remained celibate for a minimum of 24months. The first time I chose this was when I was buried deep in my yoga teaching mentorship and consumed with my own experience. The second was after my father passed away.
Both of theses times in my, there was no room for anyone else, there hardly felt like there was room for me even me.
I didn’t purposefully time them, it wasn’t like I said to myself right, I’m taking time out from sexy time between this date and date. It was just the amount of time I needed to heal, connect to the process of transformation and meet the woman who was trying to BE in the world.
In the second round of intentional celibacy, it was chanting and meditation that brought me back to the surface. Connecting to the Universal Mother for guidance, my body began to rekindle its natural enthusiasm.
I began to write down in my journal the wisdom delivered to me during my morning meditations, these precious ‘touch stones’ helped me formulate my intentions for the day.
The feelings moving through my body started to take a familiar form, it was lust. I was lustful for life again – this time the feeling was steeped in Spirit and oozing creative expression.
I recognised the hunger I was feeling wasn’t for food but for feelings of joy and play and touch and intimacy.
As a conscious and aware woman, I have never wanted to share myself or my energy with just anyone to experience intimacy. However, it did occur to me that 2 years was probably enough – the animal in me was awakening.
But how was I to relate to this Divine creature as she emerged? I could feel she was fierce with love and craving to slow-dance with grace and pleasure for the sheer joy of living again.
So I very shyly called on my yogini friend Rosie Reese, a relationship coach and founder of the Yoni Palace, who invited me over to look at her collection of crystals and to pick which ones called to me.
Now these crystals are stunning and erotic and I felt cheeky even looking at them!
Tantric yogini friends of mine had been telling me about yoni eggs, I remember thinking how empowered these women were, not like me at that time.
I had spent so much time in my head I had almost forgotten that I had a body and that this body of mine liked to feel good. Feeling good was my birthright and now that the bridge between the parts of me, the one who was dying off and the one who was being born had been crossed, there was no going back to the safety of the known yet unwanted.
The Jade Egg was a luscious blend of the colour green, soft swirls from emerald to new leaf green and it was simply gorgeous, this little perfectly smooth crystal sat so perfectly in the palm of my hand.
The only way towards full self-acceptance was to claim my innate sense of self and give myself the pleasurable sensations that my body, my heart and my soul was craving to feel.